A Low Cost Pet That Doubles as a Fashion Accessory

Are you tired of that poodle? Perhaps you're allergic to your cat. Well, if you're looking for a pet that will make you the talk of the next social gathering, and one that is easy to keep, cheap to feed, and, when the time comes, a cinch to put under, I've found your companionship.

Introducing the Giant Madagascar Hissing Cockroach Brooch, from the Black Chandelier website. At first glance, it might appear to be a tastefully decorated replica. But no! It's an actual Giant Madagascar Hissing Coachroach! At only $80 + $9.95 shipping, you're going to want to order yours today.


The pictures pretty much tell the story, but if you want further details, the Black Chandelier website notes that "These insects come in varied patterns and are decorated with the finest Austrian Swarovski crystal. Each roach takes about an hour of painstaking work to achieve his final magical glory. All roaches are male to ensure sterility, and come complete with a leash set. This consists of a gorgeous pin you attach to your clothing with a chain that clasps to the cockroach's carapace to keep him from running amok. The lifespan of these animals is approximately one year if housed and fed properly. This is not a guarantee, it is an estimate. Roaches love fresh bananas and must have access to fresh water at all times, a very damp paper towel or cotton ball will do the trick. Dehydration is the main cause of death. Keep him in a little terrarium in the dark and he will love you and be very responsive to your touch. Roaches are shipped overnight in a box and can be kept in this box for up to 4 days without food or water while you secure him more hospitable accommodations."

Plus, as noted above, there's no need to go to the vet when your pet comes to the end of his days. All that's necessary to send him to the great roach motel in the sky is a quick tramp from the Nikes. You could also opt for the Raid or Black Flag route. It all depends on how humane you're feeling.