Thursday, December 31, 2009

2010 Ghoul Pool - Sayin' Amen in 2010

As we prognosticate on which celebrities will pass beyond the veil in 2010, I think about those on my 2009 list who didn’t survive the year. Between Ted Kennedy, Karl Malden, and Paul Harvey, they made sure that the rest of the story was that health care was available to all inhabitants of the streets of San Francisco.

And now, my 2010 list = Sayin’ Amen in 2010…

  1. Geraldine Ferraro – She remains our only token female vice-presidential candidate with real qualifications for the job. Unfortunately, her qualifications for living will end in 2010.
  2. Amy Winehouse – Is she finally in a decent rehab clinic? The likely answer is “no, no, no.”
  3. Seve Ballesteros – He hit his way out of the thick rough, but he’s not headed toward the 18th green…
  4. Steve Jobs – He’s currently designing the iPod Necro…
  5. Billy Graham – He wants a chance to preach to Tiger before heading upwards. Speaking of whom…
  6. Tiger Woods – Textbook case of Swedish meatball poisoning.
  7. Elizabeth Edwards – This still appears to be the only graceful way to get rid of John.
  8. Bob Barker – He’s so old he no longer knows if the price is right.
  9. Lance Armstrong – Develops ear cancer from wearing the new high power Team Radio Shack earpiece in all of those races.
  10. Pope Benedict XVI – These days, you can’t even be elected Pope unless you’re already knocking on the Pearly Gates.
And now, it’s time for this year’s wild card pick – Rush Limbaugh. 2010 will be the year his body catches up with his brain – prepare for some welcome early afternoon radio silence.

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