Scott's Spot

Want To See Some REAL College Football?

2011-08-14T23:33:00.000+01:00

Want to see some REAL college football? How about going to a Division II or Division III game? They're just as exciting as Division I games, except they're cheaper and the participants are real college students.

Frog Sighting

2011-05-27T08:30:00.001+01:00

Frogs don't exist in the present. We hear the splash and see the ripples in the pond. Then we know that a frog had been nearby.

Name Pittsburgh International Airport for Fun and Profit

2011-05-04T21:26:00.001+01:00

About 5 years ago Allegheny County (Pennsylvania) Councilman Ed Kress proposed selling the naming rights to Pittsburgh International Airport. I blogged about it and set up a wiki and tried to have a little contest, but nobody participated.

Well, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, Kress is at it again.

Here are my entries:

Lands' End Strip
American Eagle Aerie-el
Flying Tiger Den
Marshall's Field
Depends Regional Airport
Viagra International - On-time Takeoffs Guaranteed!
Tempur-pedic Field - Ensuring Soft Landings with Space Age Technology
Right Guard Airport - Who says flying has to stink
Day-Timer International - You'll know how late you are with us
Nair Field - The smoothest ride around
The Flying Circus
Yinzer Field N'at
MisterRogers Airport of Make-Believe, now with 24 Hour Trolley Service
MisterRogers Neighborhood Airport

Osama Bin Laden's Last Words

2011-05-02T14:08:00.000+01:00

Here's one I heard at work:

Q: What was the last thing Bin Laden said to his courier

A: You feed the camel, I'll feed the fish.

Chelsea Kane's Donut Diet

2011-04-20T12:28:00.001+01:00

I had never heard of Chelsea Kane before. But look at the figure she has built on her "I eat a doughnut a day, easily" diet.

It's time for a glazed Krispy Kreme.

The Next Hardy Boys Book

2011-04-19T16:24:00.002+01:00

The next Hardy Boys book has been announced. It will be called The Case of the Supercooled Semen. Read about it here.

Tonya Harding Pregnant

2011-02-12T09:41:00.000Z

Red Alert for Clark County, Washington teachers and coaches: Skateboxer Tonya Harding is now pregnant with baby boy.

Steelers Babies

2011-01-29T13:56:00.000Z

These babies, in a photo appearing in The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, are ready for the Super Bowl. They could have easily been confused with Danny Woodhead if they had been covered in New England Patriots accessories.

Photo For A Monday

2011-01-24T22:09:00.000Z

The restaurant bathroom sign says: Laundry Day. Drop Your Pants Here.

Taken on a Monday, of course.

Now THAT'S A Traffic Cone Monster

2011-01-19T22:41:00.000Z

Traffic Cone Monster!

RNC, Fix Your Own Deficit

2011-01-15T15:59:00.001Z

The Republican Party, $20 million in debt, stands ready to take the lead in the War on The Deficit.

They decided to fix it by playing the name recognition card and electing whatsizname as their new Chairman.

Gabrielle Giffords - Sarah Palin's Gonna Get Her One Way Or Another

2011-01-08T21:44:00.000Z

Sarah Palin has turned her Tea Party "Patriots" loose against Arizona Democrats. First, it's bombs being sent to Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano. And now, it's an assassination attempt against congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords in Tucson.

No, we don't want any more of Sarah Palin's Alaska.

Looks Like He Took Some Gunshot While Riding Shotgun

2011-01-07T18:42:00.001Z

Headin' to Heaven in 2011

2011-01-01T00:08:00.003Z

I had only one successful pick in 2010 - the unfortunate loss of Elizabeth Edwards. She was fortunate to live as long as she did. If the Tea Partiers have their way in 2011, expensive sickies like her will be stricken from the health care rolls and we'll see an accelerating death rate. And while that might not start as soon as 2011, we'll still see a number of notables headin' to heaven in 2011. Here are my picks:

1. Geraldine Ferraro – Our first token female vice-presidential candidate, and the only one having real qualifications for the job. 2011 will see her trampled by a rioting band of Tea Partiers.
2. Seve Ballesteros – It will be discovered that he has a new golf ball-sized tumor that doctors are not able to cut out of the high rough.
3. Steve Jobs – He will be relocating to an underground iPad.
4. Billy Graham – Never recovers after Christine O'Donnell casts a spell on him.
5. Brett Favre – His streak of consecutive starts now ended, can his streak of consecutive days alive be far behind?
6. Bob Barker – The price of dying is now right.
7. Betty Ford - It will be found that her will stipulates the renaming of her clinic to the "Lindsay Lohan Clinic."
8. Andy Griffith - Killed in a shootout with illegal immigrants somewhere in Mayberry, RFD.
9. Dick Cheney - We're not sure that he ever had a heart, but whatever it is that pumps his blood is about to have its final attack.
10. Pope Benedict XVI – Killed when the Popemobile crashes while out joyriding on the Spanish Steps.

And now, it’s time for this year’s wild card pick – Sarah Palin. Film crews will capture the footage of her being gored by a charging jackalope after she shoots wide to the right.

Could Of Been Some Great AP Sports Writing

2010-12-19T22:32:00.001Z

...But it wasn't. This article by AP Sports Writer Tom Canavan appeared in The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers.
First, I think that the description of a play that took place today as "one of the greatest plays in NFL history" is quite likely premature.

I also think that the "He could of surrounded him, allowing his teammates to converge" sentence could of, er, have, merited further scrutiny from some AP editor.

But what do I know.

Where That Cuppa Joe Goes

2010-12-17T16:41:00.002Z

This cup claims that paper cups generate 181% more waste weight than styrofoam. Perhaps, but polystyrene cups take hundreds of years to biodegrade and are not generally recycled.

Santa Claus vs TSA Security

2010-12-14T22:01:00.001Z

Here's a picture of Santa getting ready to go through the TSA security line at North Pole International Airport.

Sarah Palin Does Haiti

2010-12-12T21:56:00.002Z

Sarah Palin is in Haiti for some sightseeing. Since she can see Russia from Alaska, I wonder if she can see Cuba from the Haiti Hilton?

You betcha!

Maybe The TSA Should Begin Profiling

2010-12-06T23:30:00.001Z

A USAirways flight from Newark to Phoenix was diverted to Pittsburgh this morning after a passenger's small dog got loose and bit a flight attendant and another passenger, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers,

Flight 522 from Newark carrying 122 passengers landed at Pittsburgh International Airport, where medical personnel treated the two people who were bitten.

USAirways said the passenger with the dog was supposed to keep it in its cage under her seat, which is the airline's policy. But she took it out and the animal ran loose.

Pfizer CEO Can't Get It Up, Steps Down

2010-12-05T23:49:00.000Z

Jeffrey B. Kindler, Pfizer Inc.'s CEO and chairman, abruptly stepped down Sunday after 4 1/2 years leading the world's biggest drugmaker, saying he needed to "recharge my batteries," according to this article.

Maybe he should check his inbox for some deals on some little blue pills.

McDonald's - Purveyors of Fine Oatmeals

2010-12-04T12:06:00.003Z

McDonald's is going to be rolling out an oatmeal item to its more than 14,000 restaurants on Jan. 3, according to this article in Nation's Restaurant News. Fruit & Maple Oatmeal, which has been in test since earlier this year, will be available all day long, with or without brown sugar, for $1.99. The item contains 290 calories with sugar and 260 calories without it.

Maybe this will allow them to sell Happy Meals again in San Francisco.

Rosa Parks - Terrorist

2010-12-01T10:02:00.000Z

Today is the 55th anniversary of Rosa Parks refusing to give up her seat on a public bus to a white man, precipitating the Montgomery Bus Boycott. Today, she would be branded a terrorist, placed on a nationwide Don't Ride list, and used to drum hate radio listeners into a frenzy.

It's A Very Very Big East

2010-11-29T22:05:00.001Z

The Big East Sports Conference is getting bigger. It's expanding its geographic reach. In fact, it's defining "East" to mean "East of the Sierra Nevada". That's right, today it was announced, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, that Texas Christian University, home of the Horned Frogs, is joining the Big East.

Southwest Airlines, er, Big Southwest Airlines, must be very pleased.

The Moon As Seen From Mars. Mars, PA, that is.

2010-11-22T23:20:00.000Z

TSA Screening - Here's a High-Tech Fig Leaf for the Modest Modern Traveler

2010-11-22T12:57:00.000Z

If you're concerned about the privacy of the new TSA screening procedures, you might want to scan this article about a special kind of underwear — with a strategically placed fig leaf design — that will get you through the airport screeners with your dignity intact.

Inventor Jeff Buske says his invention uses a powdered metal that protects people's privacy when undergoing medical or security screenings.

The men's design has the fig leaf, while the one for women comes in the shape of clasped hands.

There's no word from the TSA on whether wearing this under armor will get you a brief pat-down on your way to the Garden of Eden.

World Toilet Day

2010-11-19T21:53:00.001Z

It's World Toilet Day. I missed the Big Squat. But the day's not done - don't flush the opportunity away.

New Company Travel Policy Announced

2010-11-19T15:03:00.003Z

Hey, I Know - Next Time They Can Fly!

2010-11-17T22:19:00.001Z

Millcreek Township (near Erie, PA) police officers attended the weeklong 27th annual National Tactical Officers Association conference began Sept. 19 at Pittsburgh's convention center. There were so many of them that it took them 5 unmarked cars to get there, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers.

But it took only 4 cars to get back. The officers were so dedicated to cutting costs on the return that they decided that it was OK to leave one of their cars at the hotel in Pittsburgh. The unmarked cars receive such heavy use that the fifth wasn't discovered missing for about three weeks. The Erie Times-News says the 2006 white Ford Crown Victoria had somehow been left behind in a motel parking lot.

These fine officers, who are entrusted with weapons capable of delivering deadly force, can't keep track of a car. Great.

Pennsylvania Woman Fined For Arranging Fight For Girls

2010-11-17T15:04:00.002Z

Crystal Lynn Hall, 30, of Uniontown, Pennsylvania, has been found guilty of disorderly conduct and fined $184.50, including court costs, for arranging a fight between her daughter and another woman's daughter, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers. The other woman, 31-year-old Audrey Schreckengost, of Adah, arranged for their daughters, ages 11 and 12, to fight.

These losers would be in jail if they had pulled a Michael Vick and done the same thing with dogs.

My Belly Button Says That I Can Be Trusted. Some May Disagree...

2010-11-17T12:53:00.002Z

You Are Trusted

You are down to earth, humble, and honest. You are likely to be in excellent mental and physical health.

It's likely that you will have four or more children... whether you use birth control or not!

You are not easily moved. You are very stoic and not though of as an emotional person.

You are very detail oriented and tidy. Some may even call you obsessive.

You are quite conservative. You are neither a flirter or a flaunter.

What Does Your Belly Button Say About You?

Blogthings: Take a Quiz. Annoy Your Friends.

I Am A Jellyfish

2010-11-17T12:37:00.003Z

You Are a Jellyfish

You are a vulnerable person, but you also have a lot of inner strength. Sometimes you even surprise yourself.

You are very honest and open. You have nothing to hide and resent it when people don't tell you the truth.

You are illuminating and insightful. You understand and explain the world well.

You are energizing and enthusiastic. You get people up and moving.

What Sea Animal Are You?

Blogthings: Our Quizzes Weren't Written By Bored 12 Year Olds

Pennsylvania Man Swallows Family Jewels

2010-11-17T10:23:00.003Z

Police in Washington County, Pennsylvania say that fifty-three-year-old Robert Spriggs has been charged with stealing two rings, each valued at $30,000, while visiting his 81-year-old mother on Saturday, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, one of America's Great Newspapers. An additional ring has been found in his pocket, and two more have passed through Spriggs' digestive system as he has remained in a Washington County Jail cell without a flushable toilet.

Now police have learned two tennis bracelets are also missing, leading them to wonder if Spriggs might have swallowed them too.

Lt. Dan Levi says police "are in a holding pattern." Mr. Spriggs may also be in a holding pattern, but that can't last forever.

Cheney Dying From Bush Care

2010-11-16T16:13:00.000Z

Former Vice-President Dick Cheney was recently photographed at the groundbreaking ceremony Tuesday in Dallas for George W. Bush's planned presidential library. He was noticeably thinner and walked with a cane. Rumors are that he's dying because his insurance claims were denied under "Bush Non-Care" due to his pre-existing heart disease.

Steelers Cut Jeff Reed, Replace Him With Sushi

2010-11-16T12:33:00.002Z

The Pittsburgh Steelers have cut kicker Jeff Reed, and replaced with former Washington Redskins kicker Shaun Suisham, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers.

Suisham is expected to have more kick than Reed, although that may depend on the wasabi.

University of North Dakota Should Say "So Sioux Me"

2010-11-15T14:25:00.003Z

The NCAA sanitation of college team names, logos, and mascots continues. This time, according to this article, they've struck at the University of North Dakota in Grand Forks, ND, where the NCAA has concluded the 80-year-old Fighting Sioux nickname was hostile and abusive.

Apparently, the Spirit Lake Sioux tribe endorsed the nickname, but the Standing Rock Sioux tribe did not.

So now all the logos need to be removed, awards need to be renamed, and a new team name and mascot needs to be selected.

On the other hand, the University of Mississippi (Ole Miss) had to get rid of their Colonel Reb mascot, which was inspired by Blind Jim Ivy, a black man, but still are allowed to be called the Slaveholding Insurgents, er, Rebels.

Or Else I Shall Resort To Using the Holy Hand Grenade

2010-11-14T14:19:00.000Z

Thy number of remaining meetings with the Holy Council shall be two. No more. No less. Two shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be two. Three shalt thou not count, neither count thou one, excepting that thou then proceed to two. Four is right out. Once at the number two, being the second number to be reached, then, refusest thou any entreaty to be joined thereto, and donnest thou raiment suitable for returning to thine own kingdom.

Eddie Munster Checks Into Rehab After Being Caught Driving Hearse Erratically

2010-11-11T15:42:00.002Z

The former child star who played boy werewolf Eddie Munster on TV has entered a drug and alcohol treatment facility, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, and, if that's not reliable enough, here.

Butch Patrick's agent said Thursday that the 57-year-old is in a private facility in New Jersey.

These Are The Cats That Could Kill The Rats That Lived In The House...

2010-11-11T15:11:00.001Z

...with apologies to Mother Goose...

They need to take the cats from the Arlington section of Pittsburgh and use them to combat the rats from this nearby Beaver County home.

"These are the cats
That killed the rats
that ate the dog food
dumped on the floor
of the house that Debi owned."

My Sunglasses Say I'm An Artist

2010-11-06T03:18:00.008Z

Your Sunglasses Say You're an Artist
You are clever, unique, and a total nonconformist.

Your sense of fashion is based on your own personal creativity.

You need to be shaded from the mundane parts of life.

You feel sunniest when you can express yourself freely and without judgment.

The Sunglasses Test

Blogthings: Our Quizzes Weren't Written By Bored 12 Year Olds

Pine Creek Journal Fires Proofreader

2010-11-05T03:45:00.001Z

...who is subsequently hired to make posters for Tea Party rallies.

Wow, 82 Cats. That's a Big Freezer!

2010-11-04T22:48:00.000Z

According to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, an 82-year-old woman, Pauline Habursky, of Union City, PA, near Erie, will be allowed to keep 3 of her 25 live cats. She also had 82 dead cats carefully packaged and stored in her freezer. The article didn't say if she was allowed to keep them or not.

The Descent Into Hell Continues - San Francisco Bans Toys in Hi-Calorie Meals

2010-11-03T14:35:00.000Z

Yahoo reports that San Francisco's Board of Supervisors passed the law on a veto-proof 8-to-3 vote. It takes effect on December 1, 2011.

The law, like an ordinance passed earlier this year in nearby Santa Clara County, would require that restaurant kids' meals meet certain nutritional standards before they could be sold with toys.

People are gonna have to go back to fryin' up burgers at home, just like the old days.

Corbett Poised to Pollute Pennsylvania's Drinking Water

2010-11-03T09:10:00.002Z

According to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers, Pennsylvania Governor-elect Tom Corbett says one of his first acts in office will be to lift a moratorium on Marcellus Shale gas-drilling permits on state lands, reversing a halt to the controversial process imposed by outgoing Gov. Ed Rendell.

What a fracking outrage. We're going to need a new travel slogan - "Visit PA - But Don't Drink the Water."

Pennsylvania's Voters Leave Brains In Car Before Voting

2010-11-03T04:28:00.003Z

Maybe I've gone to bed, and it's just a bad dream, but it it appears that we Pennsylvanians have just elected:

A Governor who can't pronounce the state's name (yes, it has an "L" in it) and who abused his former office of Attorney General by trying to silence those critical of him on the internet.
A U.S. Senator who wants to despoil Lake Erie, now that it has been restored to health, and who wants to reduce the size of government so that it gets out of the way of Wall Street.
A State Senator (re-elected, mind you) who has been indicted for using State offices for political campaigning.

The only honorable right-wing nutjob failed to be elected. Go figure.

Stink Bug - Prophet of Today's Election Results

2010-11-02T13:22:00.001Z

Productization

2010-10-28T11:37:00.000+01:00

The word "Productization" is an example of the abominalization of the English language.

Bacon is Good For Me

2010-07-15T22:32:00.001+01:00

Butter Battle, But NOT the Dr. Seuss Type

2010-06-23T21:13:00.000+01:00

An argument over butter in a macaroni and cheese recipe churned into violence between a brother and sister near East Wenatchee, Washington.

A 21-year-old man called police June 6 to say his 17-year-old sister had tried to cut his neck with the serrated edge of a spatula.

The police report says the sister was making macaroni and cheese when her brother asked if she was using butter. That led to an argument over the difference between butter and margarine. And, then butter battle escalated.

The Wenatchee World reports the girl was charged in Douglas County Superior Court with fourth-degree assault.

Now That's What I Call "Not Greedy of Filthy Lucre"

2010-06-15T22:07:00.001+01:00

According to a recent report, St. Louis worker found $58 - packed in dog poop. Steve Wilson works for DoodyCalls Pet Waste Removal. On a recent call, he noticed money sticking out from doggie doo. Wilson wasn't sure what to do, but eventually pulled out the bills, sanitized them, placed them in a plastic zip-locked bag and returned them to the customer. It turned out to be $58.

The company said the money was torn, but the serial numbers were identifiable, which means the bills could be returned to a bank and replaced with new money.

The Association of Professional Animal Waste Specialists says Wilson is the first person in his profession to find and report money in dog poop.

I think that even the dog's owner would have supported Wilson's keeping that tip.

2010 Rachel Carson Challenge

2010-06-14T12:29:00.000+01:00

On Saturday I will be doing the 2010 Rachel Carson Challenge. Or, at least, I’m planning on starting it. You see, the Rachel Carson Challenge is a one day hike. A one day 34 mile hike. A one day 34 mile hike over some of the most treacherous hiking trails that Western Pennsylvania has to offer. The challenge is not only to complete the hike, but to do so during the allotted time – the amount of daylight available on the longest Saturday of the year. And this year, 2010, that time is 15 hours and 4 minutes.

This is the fourteenth year for the Rachel Carson Challenge. In the first year, 90 people registered but only 5 finished. This year, the registration limit of 600 has been reached. How many will finish? Will I be one of them? What surprises will Western PA’s unpredictable weather bring? Only time will tell that part of the tale.

But there’s more to the Rachel Carson Trail than the physical and mental challenge of attempting an endurance event. And that’s the benefit of just being out on the trail. The trail goes fairly close to my Hampton Township residence. I’ve walked and mountain biked parts of it and some other nearby trails. But this was the first year that I’d experienced it over an extended time period. That extended exposure has given me a chance to experience an aspect of the trail that was perhaps what its founders intended. This facet is described on the back of the book “A Hiker’s Guide to the Rachel Carson Trail,” which says:

A secret world awaits you.
A world on the periphery of your world.
A world of quiet woods, cool valleys, ageless streams, and undulating hills.
A world that can change your perspective on things you see every day.
On what you take for granted every day.
The Rachel Carson Trail awaits you.

The Rachel Carson Trail really does represent a secret world that’s always there for us to experience. It’s just outside our back door, or just a short drive away. But we seldom take advantage of it, because it takes that investment of time in order to shift our perspective. For me, the perspective shift is from one where I approach life on my terms to one where I’m part of a greater whole, where I accept what nature offers to me that day.

On Saturday, I’ll see what the trail offers me, and find out how I will respond.

Big Ben Roethlisberger Cops A Feel

2010-04-17T15:17:00.002+01:00

Big Ben Roethlisberger joins President Bill Clinton in having accomplices for his sexual escapades with twenty-something females. Clinton had the Secret Service watch the doors to the Oval Office during his encounter(s) with Monica Lewinsky, and Roethlisberger apparently had Pennsylvania State Trooper Ed Joyner and Coraopolis, PA, police officer Anthony Barravecchio ensure his privacy during an encounter with a college student in a Milledgeville, GA nightclub, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers.

He may have had a little help from Milledgeville Police Sergeant Jerry Blash as well.

That's another way of using protection, I guess.

Preventable Tragedy at Upper Big Branch Mine

2010-04-10T10:09:00.004+01:00

The tragedy of the Upper Big Branch mine disaster is not just the terrible loss of 29 miners and the devastating impact on their families and communities. It’s magnified by the fact that it was preventable. Its cause was greed. Mining operations continued while safety citations were fought in court. The mine had 48 “unwarrantable failure orders,” issued when a mine operator knowingly violates a mine safety regulation, last year. The real tragedy will take place if Massey Energy and CEO Don Blankenship are allowed to return to business as usual.

A Step Backward for Creative R&D

2010-04-08T21:59:00.003+01:00

The market normally rewards creative solutions to problems. And creative was the perfect description of the Whizzinator, developed by Gerald W. Wills, 67, of Los Angeles. The Whizzinator, a male prosthetic device, along with a product called Number 1, provided the perfect way for pilots, truck drivers and others to cheat on drug tests.

Wills and his partner, Robert D. Catalano, 65, of Huntington Beach, California, pleaded guilty in 2008 to conspiracy to sell drug paraphernalia.

Now that's what I call a head shop.

Basketball and Carbon Dioxide Sequestration

2010-03-21T22:51:00.000Z

For reasons that I can’t fathom, I watched the final minutes of the Pitt-Xavier basketball game. I lost what little interest I had in that game, though, after seeing an ExxonMobil commercial talking about how they are working to remove CO2 from natural gas and sequester it so that it doesn’t get into the atmosphere.

Sound good? Well, first consider that natural gas is almost all methane and other low molecular weight hydrocarbons. That means that, when you burn them, you get one or more molecules of CO2 from each molecule of natural gas burned.

Virtually all of it is released to the atmosphere. So the vast majority of CO2 emissions from natural gas come from burning it. Plus, I looked it up, and the CO2 content of natural gas ranges from 0-8%, and only 1/3 of the US natural gas reserves contain the 2% or more of CO2 that requires that it be purified prior to use. So sequestering the CO2 from natural gas purification stands to have a negligible effect on CO2 release to the atmosphere.

But not only is ExxonMobil spending $100 million on a demonstration plant to remove CO2 from natural gas, they’re spending an unknown amount of money advertising it on TV.

I’ve gotta get more interested in basketball.

Tiger Woods to Return to Mistress, er, Masters

2010-03-16T16:23:00.002Z

Tiger Woods announced today that he would be leaving Elin Nordegren, at least for the weekend, and returning to his Mistress, er, the Masters, on April 8, according to a Yahoo article.

No information was immediately available on whether Woods would be accompanied by personal trainers Tess Tosterone or Anna Bollock-Steroid.

How To Get Kids to Clean Their Own Rooms

2010-03-16T15:14:00.001Z

In this Yahoo article, Elisa Drake discusses how to get kids to clean their own rooms. She suggests:

Make it a game
Sing your commands
Count toys
Time the cleanup
Make cleanup easy
Encourage a continually clean room

Ms. Drake needs to have some kids to bring her to reality. I'll loan her a few of mine. And when they're done with her, I'll loan her a rake, shovel, or Bobcat to assist with the cleanup.

Dressing For St. Patrick's Day

2010-03-13T18:32:00.001Z

see more Engrish

Proof Positive That Texting While Driving is Safer Than Drinking and Driving

2010-03-11T22:30:00.001Z

Traffic fatalities for last year fell by nearly 9 percent, reaching their lowest level since 1954, the U.S. Department of Transportation reported today, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers.

The fatality rate of 1.16 deaths per 100 million miles traveled was the lowest on record, the department said.

Projections placed the number of highway deaths last year at 33,963, compared with 37,261 the year before. Fatalities have declined for 15 consecutive quarters.

Pennsylvania reported last month that the number of road fatalities last year fell by 14 percent and was the lowest total since record-keeping began in 1928.

GR8! C U L8R!

The Svelte Woman I'm After

2010-03-10T22:47:00.000Z

I've found the kind of svelte woman that I'm after. The kind that can hold her liquor.

Just check out this New York Times article. Women who drink gain less weight. This is the kind of research for which funding should be increased in these obese times.

Possibilities From Paris Fashion Week

2010-03-10T22:30:00.000Z

If you're not satisfied with the way you dress, you need look no further than Paris Fashion Week, as depicted in this New York Times feature.

Facebook Controls Space And Time

2010-03-08T22:42:00.000Z

Facebook is all screwed up. If I click "Most Recent" there are 2 recent posts that are in one order. But when I click "Top News" the order and times are reversed.

It's as trustworthy as Dick Cheney and his lackey President.

They're Putting Their Apostrophes Over There

2010-03-08T21:51:00.005Z

They're putting their apostrophes over there. It's a shame when an apostrophe's not put in its proper place.

You Scored an A

You got 10/10 questions correct.

It's pretty obvious that you don't make basic grammatical errors.

If anything, you're annoyed when people make simple mistakes on their blogs.

As far as people with bad grammar go, you know they're only human.

And it's humanity and its current condition that truly disturb you sometimes.

The It's Its There Their They're Quiz

Finally - A Better Mousetrap

2010-03-06T08:48:00.001Z

Sometimes, the cats just don't get the mousing job done. Here's how you can properly usher the vermin into the afterlife.

(Click here for more coffin-inspired items.)

Hannah Teter, A New Olympic Hero

2010-02-19T21:38:00.000Z

In 2006, I wrote (here and here) about Olympic Gold Medalist Joey Cheek, who donated his medal bonuses to the charitable Right to Play organization.

Cheek has a worthy successor in snowboarder Hannah Teter, who donates to several charities and is donating her winnings to the Haiti relief efforts.

Hannah Teter joins Joey Cheek as a true Olympic hero!

Greetings From Western Pennsylvania, Where...

2010-02-14T12:53:00.001Z

...we love to decry the evils of big government while extolling the virtues of our duplicative locally controlled service providers (we don't call them "government, though...)

As reported in The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers:

When snow begins to pile up on roads in Allegheny County, the job of clearing them falls to more than 100 governmental jurisdictions, including PennDOT, Allegheny County, the City of Pittsburgh and smaller boroughs and townships.

Garrett County, MD - NOT a Kindler, Gentler Place to Live

2010-01-31T20:51:00.000Z

According to an article in the Cumberland Times-News, Garrett County (MD) property owners who are 60 or more days delinquent on payment of their water and sewer bills could see their properties put up for public tax sale as early as May.

My Kids Celebrated Martin Luther King Day...By Sleeping In

2010-01-18T12:29:00.000Z

A DOWNWARD Trend in Defense Spending is the Change I Voted For!

2010-01-13T22:18:00.000Z

Meet the New President. Same as the Old President.

Durango Herald News, Obama seeks $708 billion in defense spending

Avatar - Great Movie, But You Already Know The Plot

2010-01-13T08:37:00.005Z

I really enjoyed James Cameron's Avatar movie, which I saw in IMAX 3D. The basic plot, though, is not exactly original, as shown in the picture below from the Fail Blog.

The Inhumanity of NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg

2010-01-12T23:08:00.001Z

Yesterday we read of the death of Miep Gies, who risked her life to protect Anne Frank and other Jews in Nazi-occupied Amsterdam. Today, on the other end of the human decency spectrum, we read of New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg, who spent taxpayer money to destroy clothes, including winter coats, that could have been donated to the needy.

Pittsburgh Breakfast Club - Canceled

2010-01-08T20:26:00.000Z

Seen in today's cancelations on the KDKA website:

Pittsburgh Public Schools
Sat. Detention Program - South Side Annex Cancelled

Paraphrase of a Russian Proverb

2010-01-07T21:00:00.002Z

To paraphrase a Russian proverb, the church and the school are near, but the road is icy, or at least forecast to be so. The hockey game is far away, but I will stop drinking after the second intermission and drive carefully on the way home.

St. Louis Plant Shooting - More Guns Necessary

2010-01-07T12:55:00.004Z

A man armed with an assault rifle and a handgun opened fire at ABB transformer company, a St. Louis manufacturing plant this morning. At least eight people were reported shot, with three confirmed dead.

Just ask the NRA - fewer gun restrictions provide the answer to this nonsense.

This Afternoon's Cancelations

2010-01-06T19:18:00.000Z

AARP #3221/North Huntingdon - Activities Cancelled
This is the chapter I want to join.

Preston County, WV Schools - Closed Thursday (4th day in a row)
This is where my kids want to go to school.

Deliverance Baptist Church - Closed - No Evening Activities
Deliverance postponed until further notice.

2010 Ghoul Pool - Sayin' Amen in 2010

2009-12-31T21:00:00.000Z

As we prognosticate on which celebrities will pass beyond the veil in 2010, I think about those on my 2009 list who didn’t survive the year. Between Ted Kennedy, Karl Malden, and Paul Harvey, they made sure that the rest of the story was that health care was available to all inhabitants of the streets of San Francisco.

And now, my 2010 list = Sayin’ Amen in 2010…

Geraldine Ferraro – She remains our only token female vice-presidential candidate with real qualifications for the job. Unfortunately, her qualifications for living will end in 2010.
Amy Winehouse – Is she finally in a decent rehab clinic? The likely answer is “no, no, no.”
Seve Ballesteros – He hit his way out of the thick rough, but he’s not headed toward the 18th green…
Steve Jobs – He’s currently designing the iPod Necro…
Billy Graham – He wants a chance to preach to Tiger before heading upwards. Speaking of whom…
Tiger Woods – Textbook case of Swedish meatball poisoning.
Elizabeth Edwards – This still appears to be the only graceful way to get rid of John.
Bob Barker – He’s so old he no longer knows if the price is right.
Lance Armstrong – Develops ear cancer from wearing the new high power Team Radio Shack earpiece in all of those races.
Pope Benedict XVI – These days, you can’t even be elected Pope unless you’re already knocking on the Pearly Gates.

And now, it’s time for this year’s wild card pick – Rush Limbaugh. 2010 will be the year his body catches up with his brain – prepare for some welcome early afternoon radio silence.

EZ Cracker - Order Yours Today

2009-11-21T10:44:00.000Z

Hurry - the season of useless gadget purchasing is rapidly approaching!

A Very Cool Clock. But Why So Expensive?

2009-11-12T22:55:00.002Z

Just $2338 plus shipping.

Anvil Shooting

2009-11-08T21:31:00.000Z

Anvil Shooting is way cooler than what you're going to be doing today.

A Periodic Table That's Both Decorative AND Functional

2009-11-08T13:13:00.001Z

How The Tide Rises, Lifting Few Boats

2009-10-21T22:08:00.001+01:00

Are you in the boat, or providing the buoyancy?

Jeff Reed to Play Sunday, Promises to Punch Favre's Lights Out

2009-10-20T18:15:00.004+01:00

Jeff Reed, placekicker for the Pittsburgh Steelers, will play in this coming Sunday's game against the Minnesota Vikings, according to an article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers. Reed was cited for public intoxication after last Sunday's game.

Head Coach Mike Tomlin said that he has all week to work with Reed, who he wants to go one-on-one with Brett Favre. Tomlin said that Reed needs to learn to keep his hands up, or he'll be tackled just like he was by the Pittsburgh Police.

My Email Function is Archive

2009-10-14T12:26:00.005+01:00

I'm fine with the Archive part but the rest of the discussion is totally off.

You Are Archive

You are competent, organized, and careful. You know how to stay on task and focus on the most important thing.

You like to have everything in its place. Messes and chaos completely stress you out.

You have a system for almost everything in your life, and you don't like to deviate from it.

Calendars, routines, and having things in a certain order keeps you calm. You don't like to shake things up too much.

What Email Function Are You?

Blogthings: Waste Time at Work!

How To Fix Pirates for 2010

2009-10-06T23:14:00.000+01:00

That's easy. Fire Neal Huntington.

Pittsburgh's Finest Break Wind

2009-09-25T22:28:00.002+01:00

This is the best photo ever from the G-20 summit, from the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, One of America's Great Newspapers:

As Jim Croce sang,

You don't tug on Superman's cape
You don't spit into the wind

Also, you don't lob tear gas canisters into the wind. Just saying...

Pittsburgh - America's Police State 2009

2009-09-24T22:10:00.001+01:00

You have the right to remain silent. In fact, we demand it.

Photo from NY Times

Great Tits

2009-09-14T15:15:00.000+01:00

There's nothing like great tits. And now, from the world of research, we know more about how to keep them great.

According to an article in the New York Times, distributor of "all the news that's fit to print", we learn that Great Tits, those perky little songbirds, have moved beyond the typical diet of seeds, insects, berries and fruits, and have taken up pecking and eating small bats.

They actually attack the bats while they're hibernating. Imagine it, you're sleeping, and get woken up by some great tits.

Life doesn't get much better than that!

Horses Photo and Haiku

2009-09-13T21:57:00.000+01:00

Two horses, Grazing

near the wood, Together, Not

seeing eye to eye

9/11 Photo and Haiku

2009-09-12T00:16:00.000+01:00

Twenty attackers

Three hundred million must change

We’re losing so far

How People Find My Blog

2009-09-11T15:36:00.000+01:00

I always enjoy finding out how people find Scott's Spot. There have been alot of people searching for Usain Bolt information and photos lately, so they've been finding one of my previous posts.

But today, I got a great hit by someone searching for photocopies of butts. Looking at the screen capture, you can see that they're starting at hit #60, which means that they're looking hard for just the right butt photocopy photo.

This is exactly the kind of person we're looking for at Scott's Spot.

Rep. Joe Wilson's Website Down

2009-09-10T22:06:00.002+01:00

Rep. Joe Wilson's website has joined Wilson himself, and is down.

Hampton School District Flunks Civics

2009-09-07T22:14:00.001+01:00

Tomorrow, the President of the United States will address the country's school students. He plans to urge America’s schoolchildren to dream big dreams, respect their teachers, to study hard and learn from failure.

It's the kind of message that students need to hear. But not at Hampton Township School District, in Allison Park, PA. Hampton's website posted a message informing residents that "Hampton Township School District will not broadcast President Obama's live speech on Tuesday to any of our students. Further, it will not be shown at any time to students in Grades K through 8."

The notice further notes that after review, some or all of the speech, if appropriate, may be considered for inclusion in social studies classes, although, if included, students will be allowed to opt out.

You just scored a big red F in Civics, Hampton.

Another Blow to Peace in the Middle East

2009-09-07T08:29:00.001+01:00

According to articles in CNN and Yahoo, Israeli Defense Minister Ehud Barak has approved the construction of 455 housing units in the West Bank.

That's a sure way to slow down or derail the peace process, in which Israel doesn't seem to have the slightest interest.

And, by the way, how is it that the Defense Minister is the one approving this?

51 Ways To Leave Your (Former) Lover

2009-09-01T23:00:00.001+01:00

When you've gotta go, you've gotta go, I guess. But you should do it in a reasonably easy way. And certainly in an easier way than Anthony Miller did it.

Miller says he robbed a bank in Ephrata, PA, in 2007, because he wanted to leave his then-wife but she had threatened to commit suicide if he did. According to Robert Beyer, Miller's defense attorney, Miller approached tellers with a BB gun, asked for money and told them to call the police. He said Mr. Miller even asked for updates on their efforts to reach authorities.

Mr. Miller pleaded guilty in June. Lancaster County Judge Louis Farina sentenced him to three to six years in prison yesterday.
Mr. Beyer says the couple divorced within the past year.

Boob Reduction

2009-08-31T23:37:00.001+01:00

According to this article in the Clearfield Progress, they're doing some boob reduction up in Central Pennsylvania.

Twenty-seven-year-old Mirinda Boob has been charged with conspiracy to commit first-degree murder in the Aug. 23 death of 29-year-old Samuel Boob. Ms. Boob was ordered held on $2 million bail, only hours before a scheduled memorial service for her Boob husband.

Twenty-nine-year-old Ronald Lee Heichel of Bellefonte is accused of shooting Samuel Boob in the victim's Centre Hall garage.

We'll keep you abreast of the details here at Scott's Spot. We won't rest until all has been revealed.

Swine Flu Prevention

2009-08-24T22:32:00.000+01:00

It's back-to-school time, and this year we've got swine flu to deal with. Use the technique depicted below to prevent the spread of pig flu, Hong Kong flu, bird flu, mono, or whatever else ails you.

I Am Twitter!

2009-08-11T20:18:00.003+01:00

You Are Twitter

You are energetic to the point of being hyperactive. You are the ultimate multitasker.

You don't have much of an attention span for anything. You like things short and sweet.

You can't help but let everyone know what you're doing, even if it's just what you're having for dinner.

You are big on sharing what's going on in your life. If anything, you share too much!

Are You Facebook, MySpace, or Twitter?

Better Than Being Butt Ugly

2009-08-10T03:59:00.003+01:00

Your Butt Says You're Competitive

You are a powerful, assertive person. You are a go-getter in all aspects of your life.

You are genuine and humble. You believe that there's more to you (and other people) than just looks.

You are drawn toward close, one-on-one relationships. You crave a partner - romantic or otherwise.

You are friendly and self-assured. You're not one to brag, but you're quite happy with yourself overall.

You tend to be a serious, straight laced kind of person. It takes you a while to warm up and let loose.

What Does Your Butt Say About You?

SHHH! When It Comes Uranium, Mum's the Word

2009-08-01T23:44:00.001+01:00

Is it Uranium, or uranimum. I can never remember. I know that the Southern Utah Wilderness Alliance and Uranium Watch would like to see the proposed Daneros Mine go away.

Lance Armstrong vs Alberto Contador - Another Side of the Story

2009-08-01T10:54:00.000+01:00

If you follow cycling or the Tour de France, then you probably know all about the goings on within Team Astana and of the less than amicable relationship between Alberto Contador and Lance Armstrong. Well, at least you've heard the part that VeloNews, Ve rsus, and the other US news outlets have told. For more perspective on it, check out this article from El Pais, Spain's largest newspaper (original in Spanish here.)

Pittsburgh Pirates Trade Entire Team - Field Little Leaguers

2009-07-30T22:27:00.001+01:00